Illegal immigrant cross-training

I’ve found that the only time I was able to sustain reasonable levels of exercise was the brief period of time between discovering and fixing a broken treadmill and it dying in glorious battle against me (sadly, I won so we both lost) and went ot Sears to see what they in terms of treadmills.  I spoke with middle-aged salesman and non-chalantly asked if they had a treadmill with exceptional sturdiness and he directed me towards this beast.   It looked impressive (and pricy) and I mentioned that it had a much wider belt than most and that I liked that, to which he replied “yeah, it was originally so people could walk their dog on a treadmill”.  Great, I’m going to get a treadmill large enough that an entire family of Mexican illegal immigrants could use it to endurance train for a trek across the Sonoran desert.