While walking down the hall, I was rushed by a coworker who was very excited by my presence.

Him: Terry?
Me: Yes?
Him: You’re not fired yet?!
Me: No, not until next Friday.
Him: Ohmygodthankyou.  I was so worried when I came in Monday and you weren’t here so there was no cheesecake and there was this lady walking around giving people cake that tasted like it came out of a sarcophagus and I was like “no, this is what it’s like now that Terry’s gone” but I thought “I can deal” and then I was like “I need cheesecake” and there wasn’t around and I just sat in my cube staring at the wall until someone came in.