I’ve been speaking with the Hispanic custodian around lunch every day, and most of our conversations center on trivial things as I really don’t know enough Spanish to ask him his opinions of Hegelian dialectics, but for about the last month, he’s brought up the same damn topic every day: Do I like the taste of cats.  I haven’t been able to switch the topic so every day we’ve talked about various cat sandwich toppings as I’m conversant in Spanish food.

Until today, where he pointed at the window at a woman walking past a car. And asked “So, what do you think of my (word I couldn’t identify)?”  I had no clue as to whether he was talking about the woman or the car.  Both were quite… well… warn “played” in the vernacular of card condition so I had to find impartial responses that could apply to both, how long have you known each other, is it better than your last one and are you having fun with it.  I hope we return to discussing eating cats shortly because I insult his girlfriend or more dangerously, his car.

For the last few days I’ve been seeing blobs of color our of my right eye.  Today I saw one that appeared to move while I drive and figured it was time to see a doctor until moments later a mouse poked his head over the front passenger seat and gave me a “howdy, neighbor” look.  I thought nothing of this until later I heard a chewing noise shortly followed by my front right speaker going silent. Now I only have a 12″ woofer providing sound, and NPR has started to sound like Charlie Brown’s parents.  This means war.

For the last few days I’ve been seeing blobs of color our of my right eye.  Today I saw one that appeared to move while I drive and figured it was time to see a doctor until moments later a mouse poked his head over the front passenger seat and gave me a “howdy, neighbor” look.  I thought nothing of this until later I heard a chewing noise shortly followed by my front right speaker going silent. Now I only have a 12″ woofer providing sound, and NPR has started to sound like Charlie Brown’s parents.  This means war.