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It’s been a bit since I’ve updated the Swine Flu death comparison.  Swine Flu is at 436 deaths in the US (Source: CDC).  Here are some things still more likely to kill you:

  • Birth Asphyxia
  • Discharge from very large firearm (at least .5o caliber) or artillery piece
  • Drowning in a swimming pool
  • Falling out of bed (it’s listed as “falls involving a bed”, I assume this doesn’t mean the bed pushed you)
  • My favorite “Electromechanical Shearing” which I’m pretty sure is death by wheat thresher/rice picker/paper pulping machine

Sleep well.

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Swine flu is now as likely to kill you as being assaulted by any corrosive substance at all.  We’re talking both acids and bases here, people.  It’s also as deadly as:

  • drinking sooo much that the fibrous scar tissue on your liver starts severing things and your abdomenal cavity fills with… stuff
  • a congenital defect of the eyelid
  • contact with hot air (excluding steam)
  • contact with a marine mammal (deadly as a dolphin!)
  • accidental exposure to cold of man-made origin

A side note, during my research I kept finding “death from benign x tumor”.  Doesn’t sound so benign does it?  Did people get tumorslapped to death or have one dropped on them like a piano?