The Russian Dolls of Thanksgiving

Every Thanksgiving my father and I have a cullinary show down.  This year I won the battle between brining the turkey and serving a block of sawdust and was prepared to begin another battle: stuffing.  My father insisted on meat stuffing which I thought was just preparing the stuffing in the bird, but in this case it was preparing the stuffing with ground beef,  I was incensed.  Replacing sugars with high fructose corn syrup I can handle, using partially hydrogenated soybean oil instead of lard I can deal, using textural tricglycerides and monosodium glutimate as flavor-enhancers I will grow to accept, but stuffing one animal inside of another is going too far.  One day, he will be eaten by an elephant and know God’s cruel irony.

The Russian Dolls of Thanksgiving

Every Thanksgiving my father and I have a cullinary show down.  This year I won the battle between brining the turkey and serving a block of sawdust and was prepared to begin another battle: stuffing.  My father insisted on meat stuffing which I thought was just preparing the stuffing in the bird, but in this case it was preparing the stuffing with ground beef,  I was incensed.  Replacing sugars with high fructose corn syrup I can handle, using partially hydrogenated soybean oil instead of lard I can deal, using textural tricglycerides and monosodium glutimate as flavor-enhancers I will grow to accept, but stuffing one animal inside of another is going too far.  One day, he will be eaten by an elephant and know God’s cruel irony.