From Sam Capagrossi, a skit idea.

Everyone knows the JC Penney skit whereby people come in succession with interesting clothing and a bystander asks the source of these threads to which the constant reply is “JC Penney”.  Finally, a sparsely dressed man appears, is asked for his name, and wryly responds “JC Penney”, hilarity ensues as the audience realizes that the clothing did not come from a department store but from a destitute syphilitic hobo.  I don’t know if the skit calls for a syphilitic but it always does in my head.

Anyway, what if it were set in Roman times and the victim is TJ Maximus?