Shirt Miss

My new shirts arrived today and they had a pulpy maiden voyage in the washing machine as I didn’t know they had cardboard braces under the the neck collar.  I was next saddened to see that the shirts were not wrinkle resistant and did a magic trick where they transformed in what looked like rhino-skinned rugs upon contact with water.  Finally, I found that I purchased the wrong size and all the sleeves were an inch shorter than I wanted.  Should anyone need me to do a disheveled white collar Bruce Banner impression I could do it once for each day of the week.