I want a Facebook utility that automatically accepts challenges for dumb quizzes, scans a database of completed tests for the answers, cross-references it with what other people you know got, and takes the quiz or what ever and yields a score within a standard deviation of what you’ve pre-selected. So if you wanted to be polite you’d set the bar at the average of your friends or slightly below or if you’re a quiz-prick you could set it to high 90s.
I’d also like a USB automated bartender that would mix you drinks as per the round of drinks sent to you by your friends. It’d be kind of expensive, but I think it’d be nice to tell someone you’re having a bad day and quickly get a Sex on the Beach or Red and Black sent to you. Integration with paypal would allow you to pay for someone’s drink.